On Waterloo Sunset

Hello! I'm writing this while listening to The Kink's Waterloo Sunset. It's a profound song about the river, sunset, lovers, and London. It is one of those songs that'll always have a special place in my playlist because of its immense power to uplift the spirit despite its name (Battle of Waterloo). 

I think it's a human thing to have a deep connection with rivers and sunsets. Sometimes, I can't imagine how life would've been had I lived somewhere far from a river. Although I rarely spent time along the riverbanks, crossing the bridges of Manila and watching the river reflects the yellow and orange hues of sunset make me feel as if those are the only sources of happiness after a long day of work. 

"You won't feel afraid nor alone when you gaze at the sunset," says the song.

Interesting takes on this beautiful song: 

Journal Progress

    It's the 1st December Saturday of the decade so I thought I'd spend a few hours trying to come up with something productive that involves journaling and writing.  Hence, here's an update of my journal progress since October 2020.

    Around 3 months ago, I had the interest to give my traveler's notebook refill a second chance. I got it last year but I stopped using it for almost 6 months. Back then, I had difficulty of adjusting to the notebook's size, particularly, how to maximise the space of every page- a total struggle. Looking back, I'm glad I spent time not using it because forcing myself to use the notebook could've soured my "relationship" with journaling. Lesson learned from notebooks : Allow yourself to have some space, some time to cool down before making life-altering decisions. 

    Fast forward to three months ago, I was listening to this album called "The Freewheelin Bob Dylan" when I thought of the album cover's color palette. I've been into album covers since forever, but this particular cover brought back memories and longings for a time period I wasn't even part of. Looking at this album reminds me of a time when life was waayy too far from the ones we live in right now. Even the image of the couple brazing the cold New York street makes me sad about something I can't even explain.

    In other words, looking at this album cover, particularly the color of Bob's jacket, his girlfriend's trench coat, and the blue Volkswagen inspired me to look for my Traveler's Notebook refill and translate the feelings I got from this album cover. I don't know why I thought of my Traveler's Notebook refill when I could use my other journal notebook. It's a question I dare not to search for answers because some questions are better left unanswered. 

Young and innocent, unaware of what's to come.

    After locating my Traveler's Notebook refill somewhere inside my cabinet, I began making my first journal entry using the album's color palette. I considered the journal spread as the beginning of the notebook's new chapter. It was, in some sort of way, an ultimatum. I knew that doing this journal spread meant no turning back- either I'll commit myself into using this notebook or part ways with this notebook forever. 

The beginning of a new chapter.

    I know it sounds weird to speak of a journal notebook like it's the biggest concern in the world. I sometimes think that it is indeed weird to put so much emphasis on a journal notebook when all it does is to document bits of my life. It doesn't entirely capture the entirety of my day, but I realised, after spending most of my time this 2020 journaling, that although journaling captures a small portion of my life, what matters is the whole process of attempting to get into the abstractness of my inner-self and translate it into something sensible or concrete. You can even call it an introspective adventure- you strip away layers of covers to get into the innermost / realest version of yourself. 

    Anyway, I know it's obvious by now that the do-or-die journal spread was a success. In fact, it began my attempt to make vintage-inspired journal entries as much as I can. There were days when I didn't make journal spreads and I was surprised to feel not-so-bad about it. My renewed interest with this particular notebook also taught me not to force myself to do things I don't like doing and not to share things I'm not comfortable of. Thank goodness for the blur option on my phone because that allowed me to conceal parts of my journal I prefer to keep to myself. 

    I guess that's all for this journal post. I don't mean to tell every detail of my journal progress because that'll surely take hours given that I have the tendency to overshare. To end this post, I'd just share this video I filmed last month featuring all the journal spreads I made on my Traveler's Notebook Refills. a bientôt

Hand creams

It was only last year when I discovered the wonders of hand creams. For years, I tried to shun away from lotions because it felt uncomfortable and sticky. This year, i saw the importance of hand creams since the virus made us wash our hands more than ever.  Even the use of alcohol and hand sanitiser could make our hands dry, and although we have limited interaction with people nowadays, it's important that we keep our hands soft. 

Actually, the affair with hand cream started when I got a set of hand creams from a relative. It was the first time I got hand creams for  Christmas, and I was really excited to try each one. I wasn't able to try every scent, though. I realised it'd be too much for me so I decided to give the rest to my friends because they have to enjoy the wonders of hand creams as well. 

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This is my current selection of hand creams.

How Does it Feel?

These live versions sound as cool as the album version. 

 

Times Passing By

Inspiration taken from the songs Times Passing By and Au fils des nuit et des journees by Francoise Hardy

 

the stars are in sight

Nashville Skyline is one of my first Bob Dylan records. It was the first album I wished to own because it was joyful and, to be honest, his electric albums are hella expensive. I got my Nashville Skyline from a store that sells records at a weekend market. The price isn't that cheap, but its condition is very good. 

His arm forms a triangle. I once thought it was the play button.

One More Night is my favorite track from the album. It feels uplifting even though the lyrics don't convey the same feeling. Also, I love Bob Dylan's voice here- the other reason why I love this album. 

On Wounds and That Bloody Blood on the Tracks

 

    I swear i could write a book about blood on the tracks. Yeah, that album. As much as i want to write about Bob Dylan's other albums ( he has a lot of brilliant albums, by the way), blood on the tracks is that one Dylan album that left a wound and healed that wound. A wound that heals itself. HAHAHAHA

    Saying that blood on the tracks is a wound that heals itself reminds me of our body's ability to heal wounds. Sometimes, it's unimaginable to think that our bodies have that power. I tend to forget that our bodies have powers like that. But our bodies can really do that, and in a way, blood on the tracks explores the same. Ok, so I'm really comparing blood on the tracks with a wound. Not the healing of physical wounds, but the emotional wounds.

    I discovered Blood on the Tracks 2 years ago, when I first heard Bob Dylan through his electrical albums. Unlike his electrical albums, which perfectly narrated the story of my life as a young adult, I saw blood on the tracks as an album that's waayy out of my league. It's nice, but my 20- year old self did not understand what the songs meant. I found it too mature for me to explore and to think about. 

    The intimidation i felt with Blood on the tracks lasted until 3 months ago, when I read a forum about the album. The people were talking about it, considering it as dylan's best. Being the "I love electric bob dylan albums" fan, I tried to look for a Blood on the tracks song that I can easily associate with his electric songs in terms of its theme, lyrics or sound. The power of associating songs led me to the album's 4th track- Idiot Wind- and 9th track- Shelter from the Storm. "Oh! this man surely loves the wind", I told myself. 

    When I was applying for a job and was doing my research for the job interview, I read an article on dailymail about songs and weather. Bob Dylan, according to the article, wrote and sang about weather more than any other artists. (You know, i find it cool that there are people who really study about these kinds of topics. I wish i'm one of them.) Even the first Bob Dylan song I discovered- Make You feel my love- sang about the weather. So Idiot Wind and Shelter from the Storm were the obvious choice for my " let's explore blood on the tracks"-self. 

    Idiot Wind, similar to Love Minus Zero from his 1965 album, twists things and changes perspective. Aside from the use of wind on its title,it's plot twist is what i like about this song. I can't count the number of times I spent singing this song as if I know what it feels to be in the narrator's shoe. Iiiiiidiot Wind. 

    Shelter from the storm, on the other hand, takes me back to those days when bob's electric songs were the only songs that made sense. The song explores vulnerability and human connection. Although the song went romantic in exploring these themes, Shelter from the Storm made it easier for me to connect to the album. It's as if the album is a continuation of his electric album, at least for me. But to say that Blood on the Tracks is just a continuation of his electric albums is wrong. Blood on the Tracks has a life of its own. It's a bloody brilliant album that you can appreciate whatever you are feeling or experiencing. 

    To provide context, let me describe my situation 3 months ago. I was perfectly well in the romantic department- shipping my favourite love team as if the knowledge that they will not end up together is something I didn't know. I was working on papers for my job. It was pretty stressful but i was working on papers, and i'd rather work on papers than work on other stuff. So you can say that my personal well-being is waayy far from the mood of the album. But i still took the risk of giving the album a try because of my curiosity.

     It's always the curiosity, you know. To be more specific, my fangirl- shipper self was so curious about the complexities of human emotions. Every time I read metas and fanfiction ( some are good, some aren't), i always wonder how people can write about human emotions and describe it in a way that makes it easier for readers like me to understand and to relate to. I know my weaknesses, writing about human emotions is one of those. And i discovered that i can work on that weakness by looking at the works of other people. That way, I can learn how to express myself in a way that people will understand. (One of the things I learned after university is that people aren't mind readers. Took me years, but still grateful for it) 

    Now back to the album, like most first-time listeners who read a thing or two about it on wikipedia, you'll probably look at the album as a break-up album. At the time the album was made, the singer was going through a rough period in his personal life.  I was one of those people who saw the songs as the story of the artist's personal dilemmas. I mean, it's easy to look at the album that way. It saves you the time to think. No wonder why people recommend this as the album to listen to when going through a break-up- it's relatable that way. 

    But because i wasn't going through a break-up when I first heard the album and i was curious, I wasn't satisfied to just call the album a break-up album.To me, there's more to this album than a blow-by-blow account of a crumbling relationship. I want to understand the album from a perspective of someone outside the "break-up bubble". I want to look at the album and see it as something that I can enjoy even though i'm not going through something rough like a crumbling marriage or relationship.

    To better understand the album and to relate it to my life, I've decided to take down notes. It goes like this, every time I discover something new about the album, I'll write my observations and reflections. Then every once in a while, I'll read my observations and make conclusions about my changing perspectives toward the album. It was fun. Sometimes, it was more fun than working on papers for work. 

    I can still remember the first time i wrote about blood on the tracks, it was on the 7th of June. I wrote that it was a break-up album, like most people. I wrote about the emotions manifested in Idiot Wind- regret, resentment, pain, enlightenment, acceptance and understanding. (is understanding an emotion? i don't know) But what i learned the first time i wrote about the album is that it explores human emotions associated with break-up beyond the realm of sadness, and that's cool. 

    What i mean is, it's cool to listen to songs and albums that explore break-ups outside the sadness bubble.  I grew up listening to songs that only associate break-up with sadness and i find it frustrating. I know that there are tons of emotions a person feel during a break-up-  I learned that from reading fanfiction and watching Sherlock- but it's frustrating that people only illustrate the situation by simply calling it "sad". 

    Over time, as i abandoned the break-up album idea, I started to look at the album, not as an individual account about relationship, but as a pastiche of stories that explores the complexities of relationships. By separating the album from the artist ( which is helpful because not everything that the artist makes is about himself), I saw the album as a story of everyone. Just because the artist was going through something when he wrote this doesn't mean that the songs are about him. The same way that just because i wrote a poem about an unrequited  love doesn't mean that I've experienced it. Inspirations are everywhere and human stories are perfect examples of inspiration. That's what makes art powerful, it connects people together, whether you re conscious of it or not.

    The song that reflects the "album as a pastiche" idea is Tangled Up in Blue. It's the opening track of the album, and I say that it's the PERFECT OPENING TRACK EVER. I can't think of any better song to open the album. In a way, Tangled  Up in Blue is a summary of what's to come. It sets the mood of the album- what to expect and what to look forward to. 

You can read Tangled Up In Blue in 2 ways: 

1. You can read it as a tangled up story of a guy's relationship with a mystery girl. That the song tells of the long and winding story of his relationship with someone; or

2. You can read it as a tangled up stories of different people. That the song is a collection of love stories, of people who felt love and saw things from different point of views. What connects the tangled up stories is, BLUE.

Ok, I'll probably stop here. Things are getting out of hand already. Sorry.

On Writing

    If there's one thing that currently makes me really curious, it's how writers have this cool super power of weaving stories and bringing their readers to a whole new world of possibilities. When you think about all the books out there, you'll realise that there's so much more to discover- very interesting worlds to discover.

    The next thing that comes to my mind, as if this whole fascination is procedural like recipe books,  is how writers translate their inspirations to create something that's completely their own. I know we've been told numerous times, by numerous people, that inspiration comes everywhere. But I realised that  the process of finding inspiration is a whole lot different from the process of actually using these inspirations to create something.

    At night, when I lull myself to sleep, I can't help but feel really really bad when I feel as if I spent the day without doing anything. I know one shouldn't be hard on oneself especially when it comes to activities that fuel passion and creativity. But sometimes, I can't help but think that without doing anything, despite all these inspirations floating, I'm not contributing anything to my growth as an individual. Life's not a success. 

    It's challenging to learn how to be patient with oneself especially when we are constantly surrounded by things that remind us that we are running behind everybody else. During my teenage years, I used to feel anxious whenever I see news articles of people my age or people younger than me doing great things. It was as if my life's a big bubble where nothing happens. Like a boat floating in the quiet ocean, life's just floating. It's an anxious feeling that I tried so much to manage. Although calming my overly anxious mind wasn't always successful, there were days when I worried less about it.

When I look back, I realise that the days when I worried less about my anxiety were filled with little events that create a bigger picture that defines success: blue skiy shining, clouds forming images, people walking, trees swaying and bird singing. Going back to the roots,  being one with nature, calms the senses and renews the spirits. There was a time when I was looking at a photo of a tree I took when I went to the museum. It's leaves were falling while it awaits for the coming season. It was a simple act but it left a profound impact on me. It was as if the tree was reminding me of what it means to find success and inspiration beyond the definitions set by man. Sometimes, all it takes is a tree to reminds us of accepting that life's flow is beyond our control. After all, weaving a story takes time.

Rediscovering Gouache Painting

Hello, it's me. Still updating this blog with noteworthy-ish discoveries. :) 

    I don't have much to say except that i was able to rediscover the wonders of gouache painting. Whether i want admit it or not, i've always had this weird love-hate relationship with painting. As much  as it inspires me, it also frustrates me. There were times when, while in the middle of painting a scene, I felt frustrated because it was too difficult. Unlike journaling, painting requires concentration and the magical eye for " shadows and highlights"-which i obviously don't have. 

    So it was a real surprise when a short documentary about Dexys Midnight Runners inspired me to paint. Not the usual inspiration for painting, but it was really helpful. Dexys Midnight Runners led to a new nighttime routine- painting my heart out. Ok, I am not literally painting my heart out. What i want to say is, I SPENT THE LAST 2-3 NIGHTS JUST PAINTING WHAT MY HEART DESIRES. It was a big surprise because i suddenly felt a little less frustrated with my works. My works are far from the best works out there, but these are my best works to date. 

    This rediscovery also allowed me to use my old paints and brushes. For the longest time, I was contemplating whether I should throw them away or keep them. When painting feels frustrating, I place them somewhere I can't see them-so as not to be reminded of what I cannot do. Although unearthing my paints took less than 10 minutes, the act of squeezing the tubes and seeing the colors come out of from the tubes made me feel a little uncomfortable. It felt like committing to something I can't finish because of the frustration it brings. Luckily, the last 3 nights made it easier for me to let go of that fear. 

    I still struggle with highlights and shadows, the picture above proves that. By the way, that's the White Cliffs of Dover in England. I chose that subject due to my recent Mr. Bean rewatch. Although the cliffs weren't part of the show, watching Mr. Bean takes me back to those days when the only thing I knew about England were its cliffs and moors. Although I've seen a lot of English shows over the years, my childhood idea about England- white cliffs and green moors-remain. 

Notes from July (which, i'm afraid, I'll post on August)

July was a long month. A very, very long month. 

Half sunny, half rainy

I think July was mostly rainy

Grey skies and gloomy atmosphere

MOVIES/ TV SERIES / DOCUMENTARIES

1. Little Women- This was the first movie I told myself I'll watch when the lockdown was imposed on Manila. It took 4 months before I got the chance to see this for the very first time ( Thanks, Netflix). The Professor is my favorite character. 
2. La Belle Personne- This is my favorite movie for this month, probably one of the favorites from all the ones I've seen since I started this monthly notes. The movie perfectly captured the gloomy atmosphere of the season. I never thought that I'd find the bleak sceneries of Europe appealing after many years of trying to remove that imagery from my imagination. By the way, the professor is my least favorite character. 
3. Shining Inheritance-  It's a surprise to see this on Netflix. Hello, childhood memories.

*My August 2020-self just noticed some similarities between Little Women and La Belle Personne- female characters, unrequited love, snow, trees, Louis Garrel as Professor. HAHAHA*

MUSIC/ PODCASTS/ AUDIO DOCUMENTARY

1. Blood on the Tracks- THIS ALBUM WAS THE PERFECT COMPANION FOR THE GLOOMY ATMOSPHERE OF JULY. I can't stress enough how much this album became the backbone of my month. I spent many days of the month listening to every single track and trying to memorise every single line and capturing every emotion of every single story. 
2. Highway 61 Revisited- This ,as this month's favorite, was unexpected. I didn't give much attention to this album as I was so into Blood on the Tracks. What got me into Highway 61 was the song called " It Takes a lot to laugh, it takes a train to cry". It reminds me of blues songs I listen to every night before I sleep. 
3. The Lion's Roar- First Aid Kit's Ruins is the soundtrack of December; a sad album to compensate for the lack of melancholy during the season. Surprisingly, The Lion's Roar sounds the same. 
4. Elle était si jolie- This song was used in the movie La Belle Personne. The song captured the overall theme of the movie, which is our inability to capture the totality of other people. There will always be a part of other people that we will never grasp no matter how much we want to. That reveals our limitations as mortals- something we tend to forget when we are in love. 

(here's a quote from the movie reflecting the song's meaning)

1. Blueberry Hill- I was listening to this while gazing at a cemetery's wonderful architecture. This song made it easier for me to go to cemetery without fear of ghosts and supernatural elements.
2. La Voix Du Silence- I did not expect to hear a French version of a Simon and Garfunkel classic. 
3. The American Civil War- I discovered a 4-part documentary on BBC iplayer app about the American Civil War. It's a topic I want to learn more about since its consequences are still evident  in American society up to this day. 
4. Classic Albums- This is another documentary available on BBC Iplayer app. The documentary discusses different classic albums.

BOOKS

1. One Day in December by Josie Silvers- Still unsure if I'll continue reading this. 
2. Voices of Akenfield by Ronald Blythe- This book tells the stories of people from Suffolk, England. It's a chronicle of village life during the first half of the 20th century. Reading this reminds me of The Kinks' Village Green Preservation Society and Arthur in terms of its setting and storyline. 

Soft and Warm Continuing

    A few days from now, my subscription to a music streaming application will expire. For a couple of months, it served its purpose of helping me survive the day, one song at a time. At this uncertain time, i spend more time listening and rediscovering the power of songs to uplift, comfort and assure anyone listening that life's going to be alright.

    The other day, I was listening to a podcast episode about albums. Although the episode was about a different band, the host briefly shared how discovering The Beatles at an early age opened many doors  in terms of his musical preferences. I realised that we share the same sentiment towards the band. I consider the band as my springboard to artists and songs I never thought I'd love.

    Sometimes, I wonder if that's a good idea at all- the springboard thing.  As I discover new bands and songs, I'm starting to move away from my springboard and that's quite scary. Scary because it feels as if the expanding musical discovery keeps me away from the band which introduced me to a whole new world. I know that's the purpose of a springboard, but still it's daunting. 

    What's surprising is that, after all these years and new discoveries,  there are days when i would go back to my springboard and make new realisations about life. 

Lesson learned: You can never really move away from your springboard- you will always go back to it. What a relief!!  

Here's a personal experience that explains the power of springboard: 

"One breezy August afternoon,  the song With a Little Help from my Friends was playing when I saw an old friend.  We weren't the best of friends. We didn't even share the same secrets nor sentiments, but it was comforting to see a person from your teenage years after a very stressful day. It was as if someone is reminding you that things are going to be alright, and that worrying and whining about life are not really nice. I rarely associate people with songs, but that's one of the rare occasions I did. "

Notes from June

Prior to the pandemic, June meant preparing for the start of classes and buying school supplies. Although we can still buy school supplies through online shops, nothing really compares to the magic of sniffing papers and testing out pens.  

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I consider this month as "Bob Dylan Rediscovery Month" because I got to listen to his pre and post-electric songs. It's weird to imagine that it took me 2 years before I finally had the courage to explore his works.  This month,  I was able to listen to several of his albums including his latest release. I still can't believe that Bob Dylan released a new album. *squeals in Filipino*

• The Times They Are A-Changin' - My preference from his folk albums. 
• Nashville Skyline - I've been a fan of this since last year but it wasn't as intensified as this year. 
• Blood on the Tracks- Probably the best discovery of all the albums I've heard this month. I never really gave much attention to this one because, as I said earlier, I prefer his electric albums. As usual, Bob Dylan has the ability to convey the emotions of his songs through his voice. That's what made me appreciate his works when I first discovered him.
• Rough and Rowdy Ways- This is the new Bob Dylan album I was talking about. Although his recent works sound different from his 60s-70s albums, I enjoyed this one. 

MOVIES/ TV SERIES / DOCUMENTARIES

• Blues America- My recent rediscovery of Bob Dylan's materials encouraged me to learn more about blues. This documentary looks at the evolution of the genre right from its beginnings in the Mississippi Delta to its prominence in American culture. In line with the recent events related to the Black Lives Matter movement, this documentary offers a brief look at the lives of people who used music to express their experiences under unfavourable circumstances. I'd always be thankful for the power of music to educate because that's what helps me to develop social awareness and empathy to the plight of people. 

• Arena- Woody Gutherie- Another documentary inspired by Bob Dylan rediscovery. This one focuses on the life of Woody Gutherie, a prominent folk singer during the 1930s-1940s America. Watching this reminds me of  a scene from Robert Mulligan's 1962 adaptation of To Kill a Mockingbird. There's a scene from that movie where Atticus' children wondered why a poor farmer paid him sacks of crops for his legal services. Atticus told his children that it was all the farmer could afford because he's poor.  That scene and Woody Gutherie's songs remind me that life during the old times wasn't as easy as most movies show.

• Happy Anniversary- I just saw this on Netflix and thought of giving it a try. I'm not really into this kind of romantic movies, but I'd say that I prefer this one than other Netflix  romantic movies (Hello, kissing booth and tall girl). 

• Toy Story 4- I almost forgot that Toy Story 4 exists until I saw this . I liked Toy Story 3 so much and I  thought that was the end of the franchise. Although I don't think another movie was necessary, it's good to see that the characters developed and that's what I root for. *Woody is such a precious toy*

MUSIC/ PODCASTS/ AUDIO DOCUMENTARY

• 25 Years of Rock- This documentary on BBC 6 Music discusses the major events from 1955-1980 through rock songs. It's an interesting way to discuss history since we usually associate the subject with names and dates. 
• Broken Greek- This is an audio book based from the experiences of a Greek boy living in Birmingham, England during the 1970s-1980s. Similar to the previous documentary, the author told his childhood experiences through the songs that made a lasting impact on his life. 
• Will You Still Love Me Tomorrow-  This documentary discusses the story and impact of the first girl groups during the late 1950s and early 1960s. 
• 1001 Album Club- This podcast talks about the different albums included in the book called 1001 Albums You Must Hear Before You Die by Robert Dimery. 
• Pod Dylan- This podcast talks about Bob Dylan songs, one episode at a time. Every episode has a special guest who also shares the story of how they became a fan of Bob Dylan. I once heard  an interesting story of a man who became a Dylan fan thanks to his workmate. It's cool how people around us influence our preferences. 
• The Velvet Underground & Nico- I got into this album because I know someone who has a jacket that has a similar design as this one's album art. The songs on this album reminds me of hot summer afternoons when there's nothing to do nor to think about. 

BOOKS

• A Freewheelin' Time by Suze Rotolo- This is a memoir about Suze Rotolo's life during the first half of the 1960s in Greenwich Village in New York City. Although she's widely known as the girl on The Freewheelin' Bob Dylan album ,  her memoir tells her journey as she discovers herself beyond her association with a famous boyfriend. It's a reminder that just because you are someone's boyfriend or girlfriend doesn't mean you're not allowed to live a life beyond your partner's world. 
• Just My Type by Simon Garfield- This book tells the story of some of the famous typefaces that we see  everywhere. This book is a good add-on if you enjoyed watching Vox's video about Cooper Black. 
• Noli Me Tangere by Jose Rizal- I never really thought about reading the english version of this novel until i was reminded of its existence one afternoon while organising our bookshelf. Like Leonard Cohen's works and Sherlock Holmes stories, I just take my time and read this just when i want to. 

Journaling during the Pandemic

The pandemic changed how i journal and how i see journaling as part of my life. I spent the last 4 years decorating notebooks with stickers and pictures, and writing about the intriguing and the routinary bits of my life. I also wrote about the lives of the characters and people I've encountered through  movies, series, books and songs. 

The life-changing events of the last 2 months forced me to change how i see journaling. *Disclaimer: It wasn't dramatic at all.*

Initially, i created the usual journal entries. That lasted until I realised how boring it is to do the same things over and over. Familiarity breeds contempt, as they say.  The realisation coincided with my decision not to follow the restrictive path of documenting documenting. The constant pressure to do aesthetically pleasing journal entries is suffocating. Stimulating in the beginning, but it slowly limits the ability to innovate. 

What happened next was an experiment- I tried different ways that'll direct me to the same endpoint. I made playlists, spontaneous journal entires, digital journal entries, updated this blog, etc. Some were successful experiments, but others weren't.  I guess if there's a take-away from that experience, it's the ability of humans to always find ways to solve their problems. 

Notes from May

As much as I want to keep most things to myself, I have to admit that doing a monthly summary of what I enjoy is fun. It forces me to be conscious because that's not always the case. hehehe

MOVIES/ TV SERIES/ DOCUMENTARIES

 1. After Life Season 2- I've been looking forward to the series' second season since last year. I like the humour of this show, although I don't really like the therapist. This show reminds me of The Wind has Risen because it talks about people who are coping with a loss of a loved one.  The soundtrack is also wonderful.

2.  Frankenstein- I saw this on youtube during the first week of the month. Watched this because it's Benedict Cumberbatch, and I want to see his other works aside from Sherlock. There are 2 versions of the play, and I obviously went for Benedict as The Creature version.

3.  Adventures from Moominvalley- The MoominsatBedtime continues on Louise Brealey's instagram, and she's currently reading The Finn Family Moomintroll. The anime features several stories from some Moomin books, and the first episode was actually taken from the first chapter of The Finn Family Moomintroll. Sadly, Comet in Moominland and Moominvalley in November weren't included in series.

4. Working Girls- Watched this because I want to know what Makati looked like during the 1980s. Although a lot has changed, some of the conflicts presented in the film are still evident today.

5. Abangan ang Susunod na Kabanata- I saw this as one of recommended Pilipino comedy shows on reddit. The show satirises the society by presenting  stereotypical characters.

6. Himala- This movie gives me that "Desolation Row' aura, which is the reason why I found it scary but in a very interesting way. This movie is a visual feast and  Nora Aunor's eyes are so expressive, she didn't have to speak to convey what she had to say.

7. Remastered on Netflix- I got to continue the remaining episodes of this musical documentary. The first episode is about the death of Chilean folk singer named Victor Jara. He suffered torture and died during a turbulent period in Chile's history. The second episode is about Solomon Linda and his family's quest to fight for their rights over his song called "Mbube" more popularly known as "The Lion Sleeps Tonight".

MUSIC

1. Francoise by Francoise Hardy- This compilation album features some of Hardy's post-yeye songs. Aside from "The Vogue Years" , I consider this as one of her essential compilation albums. 

2. The Best of Cutting Edge by Bob Dylan- Another of Bob Dylan's bootleg series, which compiles his works during the release of his 3 electric albums. It was actually a bootleg version of Just Like Woman that made me a Dylan fan. 

3. I Think It's Gonna Rain Today by Dusty Springfield- Her version is my favorite because it captures the emptiness of a rainy day. 

4. Top of the World by Carpenters- One of the songs used during the first episode of After Life season 2. A weird choice of song for struggling characters, maybe it's a joke to make fun of the characters even more. HAHAHA

5. Hey, That's no Way to Say Goodbye by Leonard Cohen- I listen to Leonard Cohen the same way I read The Adventures of Sherlock Holmes. I don't force myself to listen to his songs all at once because with Leonard, I know i have to take things slow and let it grow.

6. El Paso City by Marty Robbins- The song is the continuation of Marty Robbins' story of a cowboy and his lover from El Paso. I'm amazed that he was able to connect his songs and make a beautiful story about people from the wild west.

BOOKS

1. Dekada '70- This month, I was inspired to try a reading challenge I saw on youtube. The mechanics of the challenge is to have a protected time everyday dedicated to reading. I did not reach my goal, so it was an unsuccessful challenge, but I managed to finish 1 of the books on my list- Lualhati Bautista's Dekada '70. As much as I want to express how much I like this book, I might end up spoiling the interesting stuff. If there's one thing I'd say about this book sans the spoilers, it's that the book reignited my curiosity for everything 1970s Philippines.  

2. The Rosie Effect- This is the first book i bought for 2020. It was the second day of the year when I saw this on a second-hand shop. Bought it because i was expecting it to be as good, or better, than The Rosie Project.  It's a nice sequel, but I'd rather stick with the first book. (another case of "don't put too much expectation on things,  you might end up feeling frustrated")

3.  The Adventures of Sherlock Holmes- One of the things I realised while reading this book is to read one Sherlock Holmes case at a time. In other words, take your time. I don't know about you, but whenever I see people reading lots of books, I feel really pressured and frustrated to do the same. I know no one's forcing me to read, but it's something that really frustrates me. Reading this, I realised I shouldn't put too much pressure on myself. Sherlock's too occupied with his cases, he won't mind if it'll take me x years before i finish this book.

4. Modern Love-  I've read several  love essays already, and I'm surprised to discover how love is manifested in many different ways/forms.  I've been told many times already of love's many mysteries, but it's good to be reminded, every now and then, that love comes in many different forms. It's both humbling and comforting, especially if you're surrounded with things that see love in a specific form. By the way, there are many ways to access the essays presented in this book- there's a podcast, a book,  TV series, and column on The New York Times. 

Notes from April

( or the extension of the Notes from March)

MOVIES/ TV SERIES/ DOCUMENTARIES

• The Wind Rises- I was anticipating to see this after falling in love with 2 Studio Ghibli movies last month. The whole viewing experience was spectacular. Actually, I never thought that an animated movie could be this inspiring and emotional. What I love most about this movie was the way the movie used the transformation of Tokyo as a metaphor of the characters' transformations.
• From Up On Poppy Hill- This Studio Ghibli movie introduced me to a whole new world of 60s Japanese Pop. Furthermore, the movie made me appreciate the album "Kazemachi Roman" even more, as the movie gave context to the album's themes of nostalgia and moving forward. 
• Before Sunrise - A few months ago, I saw a video analysis of Richard Linklater's Before Trilogy on Youtube. The video analysis gave me high hopes that these movies are good. Sadly, I saw Before Sunrise and was a little disappointed that the movie wasn't as good as I expected it to be. I thought I'd love this movie because the movie contains the elements that I always look for in a movie- lots of walking, lots of talking, and beautiful sceneries. Nonetheless, Before Sunrise is a movie I'd still recommend, even to future myself, to watch on a Sunday evening.
• 13 Going on 30- Not my type of movie, but still nice. Perfect for Friday nights with friends.
• Four Weddings and a Funeral- Isn't it weird that there are movies that take you to a specific time of the day, or to a particular place? I read once that this movie is perfect for wet afternoons. I don't really know what wet afternoon means, but if it means a slow afternoon and people having their afternoon nap or tea party, I'd agree. Although I like Hugh Grant's character in Notting Hill, I did not appreciate his character in this movie. HAHAHA
• Friendzone- There used to be a time in my life when I spent my weekends watching or searching Thai movies. I never realised that watching Thai movie  was a mechanism i used to beat the stressful life of dealing with difficult people. Watching this, I realised that my taste for movies has changed- I don't find Thai movies as funny or as romantic as it was 7-8 years ago. If there's one thing that remained, I'd say that Thai movies still make it easier for me to destress from difficult people. HAHAHAHA
• Mahal Mo, Mahal Ko- Classic 70s Filipino films are the best. I enjoyed this movie because it was similar to solving a mystery, except that it's a romantic/ drama movie about a girl who has to choose between her past and her present. 
• Royal Britain: An Aerial History of the Monarchy- The most British of them all. Kidding aside, this documentary introduced me to the wonderful sceneries across the British Isles. The castles and palaces are interesting, but the English Moor and the Scottish Highlands are stunning. (This documentary convinced me to go to Scotland and see the Isle of Skye.) 

MUSIC

• Beatles 1- The ECQ gave me another set of reasons to appreciate Beatle songs. 
• She's Your Lover Now- Once upon a time, I asked my friend to share his opinion about this particular song. He said he felt sad for the singer. I felt the same.
• The Ghost in You- I discovered this one Sunday afternoon, while I was organising my stuff. Whenever I had to go out and do errands, I make sure to play this song. This song takes me to a slow afternoon somewhere far from the Philippines. 
• Never My Love- This particular version reminds me of 60s doomed lovers. A romantic song for doomed lovers. 
• They Don't Know and Soho Square- Kirsty MacColl is one of my favorite female singer-songwriters. It's nice to discover new versions of her classic songs. 
• I'll Feel a Whole Lot Better- This song reminds me of The Beatles. 
• Bleecker Street- The ECQ made us characters of Edward Hopper paintings- isolated, alone and sad. Bleecker street, although an old favourite, had a new meaning because of the ECQ. Suddenly, the song talks about, not of people from long ago, but of people who are staying at home because of the ECQ.
• Army Dreamers-  This song, in terms of its message, is similar to The Kink's Some Mother's Son. 

BOOKS

• Comet in Moominland- Louise Brealey read this on her Instagram Live. I'm so thankful for her because her MoominsatBedtime gave me something to look forward to during this ECQ.  I don't know about you, but the ECQ made me a little more anxious than the usual. To discover new characters who are as anxious as I am is a great relief. 
• Modern Love-  I only read this when I'm at the supermarket and waiting for my turn to pay for the things I bought. 
• My Dear Bessie: A Love Story in Letters- I'm not religiously reading this book. I only read this while on queue. 
• Dekada '70- My first Filipino novel in 2 years? Still reading the book because I'm not that motivated to spend time reading or doing anything aside from drawing and writing.
• The Wind Has Risen (as part of the book Modern Japanese Literature Volume 1)- I read this because of The Wind Rises. It's a realistic story about loving despite the inevitable death.  One thing I learned from this movie is the importance of having the courage to move forward, especially after a painful chapter in our lives. 

Notes from March

There are 2 things I realised while making this list:

1. That I can't spend more than an hour watching a movie without taking a short break.  It's a real life application of what I learned from university-that students' short attention spans explain why, when watching videos, teachers should pause the video and explain or ask questions to check students' understanding of the material; and

2. That it takes time to write about how movies, music, and book influence our lives. I learned from one of my workmates that writing our feelings helps to make sense of what we're experiencing. Writing concretises feelings and abstract thoughts that are sometimes difficult to comprehend if not written. 

MOVIES/ TV SERIES/ DOCUMENTARIES

• Jojo Rabbit -  This movie reminds me of a book called The Boy At The Top of the Mountain. Not my favorite among the list, but I admire the movie's cinematography and the choice of songs. I'm grateful for this movie because it opened the doors for a new fascination on the works of David Bowie. 
• Bar Boys-  I've been wanting to watch this since its release. It's an inspiring movie, not just for law students, but for everyone.  It's weird to see students whose characteristics resemble the characteristics of people you know. While watching the movie, I can't help but wonder if my career paths would've been different had I seen this movie before my college graduation.
• I Wanna Hold Your Hand- When my dad told me that he'll let us see this movie, I thought he was talking about a new movie about The Beatles. This is probably the oldest movie in this list, released just 8 years after the band's break-up.  As a Beatle fan, it has always been fascinating to get a glimpse of how the band influence other fans.
• Only Yesterday- Prior to watching this movie, I thought of Studio Ghibli as an animation studio that only produces whimsical movies. Although this movie is not as whimsical as the other studio ghibli movies, I'm captivated by Isao Takahata's works- story and art-wise. Watching the movie reminds me of Japanese documentaries I used to watch when I can't sleep.
• Ocean Waves-  To extend the feeling I got while watching Only Yesterday, I watched Ocean Waves right after I finished the first movie. Again, the movie's artworks are beautiful. My favorite scenes are the train station scenes.  I always have this weird thought that train stations should have its own movie. The story did not affect me the same way Only Yesterday did, but the story is similar to a song called Ton Meilleur Ami. 
• 84 Charing Cross Road- Who doesn't like to see a movie about letter writing and books? This movie is based on a book of the same title.  When I watch this kind of movie, I can't help but think of the magic of letter writing. The convenience of electronic mails and text messaging makes letter writing a dying art- a sad reality I find hard to accept. 

ReMastered is a music documentary available on Netflix. I've seen 3/8 episodes and I highly recommend this to anyone who likes to know more about musical personalities. I wish they'd include female singers in case they'll plan to release a new season. 

MUSIC

• George Harrison- All Things Must Pass- Weeks prior to the suspension of classes, I was deeply interested to discover the individual works of Beatle members. I read somewhere that George Harrison's All Things Must Pass is one of the best solo work of a Beatle member. Although I always consider that my preference for my favorite Beatle member depends on the situation,  this album kinda solidified this strange feeling that, after all these years, my personality is very similar to George Harrison's.  Also, the title itself is a constant reminder for any listeners that all things shall pass.  ( I'd like to think that the name of the album was George Harrison's words of comfort for their fans who found it difficult to accept the band's break-up. )

• Kate Bush- Hounds of Love- Since the start of the year, I've been spending more time listening to 80s song than before. One of the singers I discovered was Kate Bush. This is not the first time I've heard of her. Last year, I saw a movie called Started for Ten whose main character is a big Kate Bush fan. Listening to the works of Kate, this album in particular, gave me an idea why the main character liked Kate Bush.  She's creative and she uses literary works as inspiration for her songs. 
• Vira Talisa- EP-  I discovered Vira through Fur. Her song Walking Back Home reminds me of  Francoise Hardy's early songs about love. Vira is an Indonesian, she's actually the first Indonesian singer I've heard. 
• The Beatles- Komm, gib mir deine hand- This song was used during Jojo Rabbit's opening scene. This became one of my Covid- 19 anthems- my song of hope during this trying period. 
• Johnny Cash- At Folsom Prison- The ReMastered documentary inspired me to give this album a try. True enough, the album is a good Johnny Cash album for starters. The songs from these albums gave me an idea about the plight of people who live lives different from mine. I never really gave much thought about the experiences of prisoners until i heard this album. This album reminds me of biblical stories about Jesus and his disciples interacting with the outcasts of the society. It's easy to judge people whose lives are different from us, but hard to open ourselves to understand their plight and do something to help them, even in the little ways we can. 
• Kate Bush- In Conversation-  This album contains Kate Bush interviews. Since I started listening to Kate Bush, I was inspired by her creativity. Listening to this album inspired me to spend time doing art in my own ways. I noticed that there's always this lingering thought that following the formula of other people's success is the path to my own success. I'm starting to realise that success doesn't work that way. I've been thinking about this for months already.  Listening to Kate Bush talk about finding creativity and following success convinced me to actually think about my own definition of success and creativity. 

BOOKS

• Starter for Ten- By now, I know you already know that my decision to read this book was based on Kate Bush. I'm starting to believe that book Brian is way better than the movie Brian. 
• The Despair of Monkeys and other Trifles- This book is Francoise Hardy's autobiography. I'm still to finish this book, but I think I'll stop for now. While reading this book, I can't help but feel as if the anticipation of reading this book is way better than actually reading the book.